really feel for you mate, i was in similar postition 2 years ago...
was working in warwickshire on a friday morning when my sister called saying the hospital had called saying our dad dint have long left - he'd been in hospital on norwich (the new one near colney) for 2 weeks and had deteriated. I raced across and reached him and my sister just after noon. We held his hand, told him we loved him, as he drifted in and out of contiousness. He couldnt do anymore than blink - - my sister and i sang his favourite song (dont really want to say what it is though, if thats ok), I'm sure I flet his had grip mine a little tighter...... soon after he gargled and stirred - this is when I'm ashamed to say I panicked, and with tears in my eyes pleaded for the nurses to help him...... they were nothing short of fantastic, comnforting me and my sister and helping my dad as much as they could. He sounded as though he was in pain, and as a proud strong man I knew he wouldnt want to be like this - I pleaded with them to "do anything it takes to end this". They administered the little black introvenous morphine battery pump - they expalined this would ease any pain. My sister and I said farewell to him with a kiss, we then drove home to my mother (she felt too weak to experience this) where we told her he didnt have long left. About an hour later the hospital pohoned to tell us dad had just passed away. My sister and I went back and I have to say I crumbled just before I saw him.
I'm at peace with it now, but will always feel guilty I wasnt there at the very end. Its just a personal opinion, theres no right or wrong. Do whatever you feel.
My heart goes out to you.
Posted By: Cheltenham_Canary on July 12th 2011 at 13:12:07
Message Thread
- Don't wanna be awfully morbid, so sorry. (NCFC) - songwriter, Jul 12, 12:56:33
- Very sorry to hear this . . . (NCFC) - Alan, Jul 12, 22:49:28
- So sorry to hear that do what you feel is right (NCFC) - pinkney, Jul 12, 15:12:59
- Different things work for different people........I lost my Dad (NCFC) - Kirrie, Jul 12, 14:44:35
- Really sorry to hear that, as below though its what works for you. (NCFC) - megson, Jul 12, 14:01:06
- so sorry to hear this, i can't add anything there is some good advice below (NCFC) - strap_on sally, Jul 12, 13:50:33
- sorry to hear that (NCFC) - Tombs, Jul 12, 13:36:52
- good point that! (NCFC) - Cheltenham_Canary, Jul 12, 13:59:54
- there's not much i can add to what's already been said (NCFC) - Ralf Scrampton, Jul 12, 13:28:31
- sorry for your sad news, I would like to be there but as the others say, no right or wrong (NCFC) - Jumbo1, Jul 12, 13:24:23
- Deepest sympathies (NCFC) - Huge 5mal1, Jul 12, 13:20:43
- Think it is really personal. I regretted not being there with my grandad, then regretted (NCFC) - Steve in Holland, Jul 12, 13:18:39
- Up to you innit (NCFC) - pants, Jul 12, 13:12:56
- really feel for you mate, i was in similar postition 2 years ago... (NCFC) - Cheltenham_Canary, Jul 12, 13:12:07
- No right or wrong with this. I was with Dad in a hospice for much of his last few hours. (NCFC) - malkybarkid, Jul 12, 13:09:30
- Very similar to when my grandad died . . . (NCFC) - Alan, Jul 12, 22:46:33
- Having been with many families going through this over the years, I would be with him and (NCFC) - woody, Jul 12, 13:08:10
- Some people don't even get that mate, I didn't (n/m) (NCFC) - conker, Jul 12, 13:04:42
- Nor me, he dropped down dead clearing snow from his car. Nice way to go for him. (NCFC) - trustsec, Jul 12, 13:58:41
- I wasn't there for either of my parents and ... (NCFC) - meeky, Jul 12, 13:02:42
- Don't listen to anything we say, fella. (NCFC) - Arganth, Jul 12, 13:02:02
- If you are at peace with how you said goodbye, let it be. Have no regrets. (NCFC) - XXL16s_babyface, Jul 12, 13:00:22
- I'd want to be there for the last, your Mum would like it too I reckon. (n/m) (NCFC) - jafski, Jul 12, 12:59:39
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