PM Pants. Have now read Worthing Yellows input....

and it is spot on. My background is HR at a senior level and I just wish more managers were as good as he comes over - and more the point are actually prepared to do something when they witness apparent bullying / harassment. Sadly that is often not the case.

However, telling you what should have happened doesn't help you one iota. I still think on balance you should consider making a formal complaint especially if you know you will be supported by colleagues prepared to act as witnesses at any hearing should it not be resolved at the 'informal' first stage. Don't get hung out to dry though. As others have said you need evidence which can be corroborated either directly or on the "balance of probability". Just avoid the "he said she said" scenario. Be aware an investigation can take time. Whilst painful for all the individuals involved you want it done properly and there are usually legitimate reasons for delays. Whilst I fully understand your reasons in thinking not to go through with formal process your bad experience with HR was 14 years ago (and in a different organization?). I would very much like to think it has moved on.

In the end it has to come down to you and what you think is best. Talk it through with someone you trust. Doesn't have to be a work colleague. Message Boards such as this are fine, but in the end all you get is anonymous advice (well intentioned as this is) from someone without the full knowledge of the facts tapping away on a smartphone. Personally I think doing something about the situation is more important than leaving it or trying to have the problem moved elsewhere, but it's not my problem - although believe me I have had them in the past - so it's easy for me to say that. I know that it is far more complex. Good luck sorting it and have a great 9 days break.

Posted By: Saucerer, Sep 25, 11:17:43