***Hold onto your hats!***

taken from the sickipedia site;

Maddie
• There has been a worldwide scandal as all McDonald's fast food chain stores have been closed down after a new meal they released suspiciously named the "McCan meal", featuring a free madaline cake.

• What do you call that little girl who's gone missing in Portugal? Dead

• What's tanned and really, really happy? A Portuguese Pædophile.

• Maddy has just turned up in Portugal... Currently being presented with the "Hide & Seek Champion Award for 2007" by the Thomsons Childrens Club

• How much does a meal at your favourite portugese tapas restaraunt cost? .......... Your child

• Whats the difference between Matilda and Maddie? ....... Matilda can make things move..... Maddie just dissapears

• What's now a popular dance in Portugese night clubs? ............. Can you do McCann can?

• What's common to find at breakfast time in a continental house, is warm, sweet and tastes so good you know that it's bad? ..... Madelines

• How many Portugese does it take to change a light bulb? ......... Three. One to force the window, one to snatch the child and one to turn up at a petrol station three days later.

• Portugese police apologised to their nation for not acting sooner. They just wish they'd got their grubby Porto hands on Maddy first.

• The Portugese took a break from sneaking into other countries recently... they realised they can stay at home and get all the foreign children they need locally.

• Why did the Portugese cross the road? .... To molest a child.

• Knock knock.... Who's there? .... Maddy... Maddy who? ... Mad y gagging for del sexo, senor.

• Ronaldo, as a typical Portugese male, insists that he had an alibi

• Ronaldo claims he never dived... 'cept into Maddy.

• What's the difference between Brighton and Praia da Luz? ........ Brighton is full of gay men, and perhaps your wind break blows away. Praia da Luz is full of child molesters, and you can be sure to lose your daughter.

• Maddy turned up safe and sound yesterday, after the kidnappers realised she supported Everton.

• What's four foot three and has a pussy like the Arc de Triumph?......... Maddy after a week in Portugal.

• What's brown and sticky?.... A brown stick. What's blue and gooey.... Blue goo. What's red and juicy.... Maddy.

Posted By: NCFC4life, May 15, 11:30:47