Here's what they should have done instead

Flocks of bicyclists in striped shirts and berets with strings of onions round their necks and a baguette in each hand unicycling up the Champs Elysée and forming a ring around an enormous bulb of garlic under the arc de triomphe, then they all stop, dismount, lay one baguette down and use the other to lift their horn-rimmed glasses exclaiming as one "It is I, LeClerc", then Gruber drives his little tank all the way down Ave Diané and fires neun und neunzig luftballons all of which burst themselves on the top of the Eiffel Tower releasing glitter which descends to a hologram of Edith Piaf refusing oil and vinegar on a salad singing "Je vinaigrette rien" while the athletes parade up Avenue Foch only to be met by a cavalcade of striking French farmers angry at the market rate for artesanal butter.

Posted By: Old Man, Jul 26, 21:10:23