Yes, no, maybe

Had years of this - including a rant from my ex yesterday, which got sorted out okay but not until she'd wound up CCanaryJr who is in the middle of his GCSEs. He lives with me the vast majority of the time, but has a decent relationship with his mum and is looking to start spending a bit more time up there.

My personal approach has been to try and equip Jr to cope with it as best he can & to be the calm and steady one.

In the instance you mention you could offer to look after him if his mum has social stuff planned (depends if you're able to negotiate that in a tit for tat manner and not have it as too disruptive to his routines).

Each person's circs are different - but generally approaching things as neutral as possible with the kid and the ex has generally worked for me (luckily I have sympathetic friends at whom I can vent). I know there's stuff that I do that narks in the opposite direction - tbh I've reached a stage where I can mostly let it wash over me.

But yeah - aiming for calm and constructive would be my top tip.

And if being the reasonable one who refuses to engage with anything shouty enrages... Well, that can be a bonus too... Heheheh

Posted By: Cardiff Canary, May 17, 08:47:16