Underestimating the Covids, old boy follow through schadenfreude and German technology

Just back from an essential *ahem* B&Q mission that didn't go entirely as planned. Swung into the carpark thinking I know exactly what I want and I know exactly where they are, music is on sun is out morale is good bordering spiffing, so I think "f**k it, I'll be in and out like Flynn" so make the command decision to leave the sunroof open after a quick eyeball of the met situation.

Get into the store and as I am proceeding to my quarry an old boy shuffles out of a side aisle with no boots on and brown spatter all over his M&S khaki action slacks "can you help me please?" He pleads. Fucking hell he's shart himself and I'm first on scene 😬curses.

Fortune smiles upon me as an assistant girl pops up from behind the Valspar control desk and assumes command as I shamefully turn a blind eye. Before I resume my quest I realise that it isn't shart but cuprinol rustic brown fence and shed treatment and he has dropped 5 litres of it and its bounced up all over his strides the poor old duffer. Tiny bit of schadenfreude i will admit but quickly my internal VAR overturned it to sympathy. but the Gods of fate had other ideas.

I got my 2 items as planned and headed tillside and fmob's, the queue is horrendous. That's right, as I get halfway down the heavens open and I have visions of driving home in an aquarium. And the queue moves like a glacial drift. Luckily though for me I discover the chermans have built in a rain sensor so the roof auto shuts saving me from swamp arse.

Maybe the unfortunate fella was old git getting some paint for his study?

Come on Norwich

Posted By: Tombs, Jun 19, 13:36:19