My Grand Strategy can now be revealed

To be honest I've been getting a bit bored of football of late. Towards the end of last season I decided on the following Three Point Plan:

1. Abandon football in favour of the national Kabbaddi league. This will involve signing a number of new players - and why oh why did I let Holty go? This part of the strategy is now in full swing and a full rebranding to NCKC is just round the corner.

2. The club has discreetly placed a spread bet on the "offside differential" i.e. the number of times our players can get caught offside in a season minus the number of offside traps we spring at the other end. This is projected to provide enough money to extend the Jarrold Stand roughly as far as Trowse. Next year we're going for one involving corners as well.

3. Errr...not sure, not mean?

Posted By: Nigels Arse, Nov 24, 10:20:59