Well I don't know about good and its a bit long, but...

This bloke has been preparing for his hunting holiday for months. He's got all the kit and wait to go Bag Himself a Grizzly.

Anyway, he heads up to the mountains and sets up camp. Dawn the next day sees him hiding behind a log with a perfect view of a popular watering hole.

Suddenly there's a rustle in the bushes. Rustle. Rustle rustle. Out wanders a huge bear. He's opbviously just woken up, his fur is all over the place and he's scratching his crotch while yawning.

The hunter can't believe his luck. He takes aim with his high powered rifle, fires and hits the bear full on. Or so he thinks.

He rushes over to the scene to find no carcass, no bear. As he wildly looks round, he feels a tap on his shoulder. Who should it be but the bear, looking - as you'd expect - just a tad pissed off.

"Waddya doin'?" Says the Bear incredulously "I've just got out of bloody bead and you try to shoot me. For Chrissakes...!"

The hunter is quaking in fear.

"OK here's the deal" says the bear "You've a choice. I can either rip your head off and tear you limb from limb, eating your choiciest parts."

"Or you can drop your trousers, bend over and I'll roger you senseless. It's your call."

The hunter's not too happy but 3 hours later he's crawling, tattered and torn, back to the camp. Cursing the bear and swearing revenge.

Dawn next day see the hunter behind the same log, only this time with an AK47. "I'm going to git that bear" he curses.

Same routine as the day before. Rustle in bushes, sleepy bear emerges, hunter takes fire - letting off the whole clip - before rushing toward the bear. Once again, there's no sign of the animal.

There's a tap on his shoulder and the hunter turns round - terrified - to see an extremely pissed off bear, hands on hips, with another bear standing behind him.

"You don't get it do you?" says the bear "OK, same choice as yesterday. Either I tear you limb from limb and chew your tasty bits or you drop your trousers. Only this time my brother Bob is going to join in too".

6 hours later, bloodied and tattered, hardly able to move, the hunter reaches camp swearing revenge once again.

Next dawn, same drill. Same log, same bear, only now the hunter is armed with grenades and rocket launchers.

The bear energes - sleepily - from the woods to be greeted by a hail of shellfire. The jungle is disintegrating, blown to matchwood.

The hunter ceases fire and rushes down to the site, looking around frantically, grinning madly.

Suddenly, there's a tap on his shoulder. He turns round, shaking in fright, to see not just our bear and Bob, but a whole queue of bears, stretching back into the forest.

"You know mate" says the bear.....

"I don't think you're really here for the hunting are you?"

Posted By: pieman63, Nov 4, 14:36:48