here's a quick list of the same sort of things from our site.....

#1 - Any discussion of a lady with specific reference to her attractiveness must always be accompanied with an image of suffient quality to allow other chatters to make a judgement without having to resort to Google. There are some exceptions to this rule, but not many, so always err on the side of caution.

#2 - Don't mention Moscow (note - we are aware that this rule is a paradox in itself. But... f**k off).

#3 - Any mention of Steve Guppy must be diluted by including a middle name, "Fucking".

#4 - All questions of a numerical nature must be replied to with "23" by all currently logged in users, immediately.

#5 - All celebrity Chelsea fans are karnts, *except for* musicians, comedians and other sportsmen/women, in which cases the inverse applies.

#6 - When in an argument/conversation with Asger, it is necessary to ridicule his profession.

#7 - Any "problem" post by a chatter must in due course be followed by an amusing post from another chatter posing as the "other person" in the dilemma referred to earlier.

#8 - The height of our players can vary by as much as 4 or 5 inches on any given day

#9 - the only acceptible response to a post by Perillo is 'fakk off you cont'.

#10 - Chelsea is West London. We've all talked about it and agreed.

#11 - Any new posters should be ridiculed and offered bank and sort numbers.

#12 - All media are biased and the commentary last night/today was so one sided. Andy Gray is a twunt.

#13 - Any story showing Chelsea in a bad light in the media is false, while any story showing any other club in a bad light is true.

#14 - The only two TV channels are BBC2 and BBC23.

#15 - Any new female poster must receive a request to show us her tits.

#16 - Any wefewence to the (now ex) manager of Liverpool FC should be wendered thus.

#17 - National stereotypes are essential and provide useful information.

#18 - Other clubs must be referred to by their general stereotype - Liverpool = thieves etc.

#19 - The following nicknames are forbidden

- Cashley
- Benny
- Kalouless
- 'Fat' Frank
- YJC

#20 - The following nicknames are mandatory

- Shrek
- Percy
- Fibreglass
- YJM
- SJC

#21 - Pronunciation of Josh McEachran's surname is incomprehensible.

#22 - A post in the incorrect place must be defused with the always humorous "Oops, wrong hole".

#23 - All typos must be corrected with a post which contains an inadvertent typo.

#24 - Any exclamation such as "total whaanker" in reference to, say an unpopular opposition player of TV figure, must be intentionally misunderstood to apply to the original poster him(or her)self and be replied to in turn with with a comedic "bit harsh" or some such.

#25 - The Inter Milan press department is the most clued-in in world football.

#26 - Try not to mention fish, horses, cheese or other foodstuffs due to the inevitable puns.

#27 - Things which have happened in the past are referred to as "'istreee."

#28 - Arsene Wenger must be referred to libellously.

#29 - Say LOL even if you haven't.

#30 - Any mid-thread post which the contributor feels is sufficiently important OR has failed to elicit the correct response is to be made as a new thread at the top of the page.

#31 - Continued on Page 4.

Posted By: Karnivore, Aug 10, 17:59:04